I allow others to close to me. Maybe too close. I have tried to get away from people, but for one reason or another I find myself surrounded by great people. This should be a good thing, but I am a dangerous soul. At first glance, I am visually appealing. I am well mannered, well spoken, intelligently intriguing, and respectful. Once people notice, something inside them draws them to me. Slowly, my company becomes a necessity. I might give subtle hints that there is a lot more to me than what they see. Innocently, they start to come closer. Little do they know that they have only seen the tip of an iceberg.
The problem I seem to have is that all the features that make me so attractive slowly become painful. As people notice that my needs are greater than what they can give, frustration begins to appear on their beautiful faces. When all the love they can give me is never enough to satisfy me, sadness arrives. When after giving and giving they find that they don't receive the same attention, desperation consumes them.
It is not my intention to hurt the ones that get close to me. I just don't want to hurt myself trying to give them the type of happiness that they think I am able to give them. I have tried to convince myself that it doesn't have to be this way. I don't have to hurt anyone… Maybe they hurt themselves by getting close to me.
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